Summary
A Cross Cultural Kid (CCK) is someone who has meaningful interaction with more than one culture before the age of 18. This can include children who grow up with, experience or regularly interact with different cultural environments during childhood. Examples include children from multicultural families, children raised bilingually, children adopted across cultures, children who grow up between different cultural communities, refugees, asylum seekers, and children who permanently move to a new country. A child does not need to have lived in another country or moved frequently to be considered a CCK; meaningful cultural experiences can develop through family, community, education, language, relationships and other parts of everyday life.
CCK is a broader term than Third Culture Kid (TCK). While TCKs are a type of CCK, not every CCK is a TCK. The key difference is that the TCK concept generally involves a transient lifestyle where future moves are expected, whereas a child who moves permanently to another country and settles there would not typically be described as a TCK. For example, a child who immigrates with their family and permanently settles in a new country may have meaningful experiences with multiple cultures and therefore be a CCK, without having the transient lifestyle associated with being a TCK.
There is no single way to experience being a CCK. Some children may feel strongly connected to multiple cultures, while others may feel that they do not completely belong to any one cultural group. Their experiences can also change as they grow older and encounter different environments. For some, growing up across cultures can provide opportunities to develop cultural awareness, adaptability and an understanding of different perspectives, while for others it may also create challenges around identity, belonging or navigating different cultural expectations.
A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is someone who spends a significant part of their childhood living in a culture that is different from their parents’ or passport culture, often because their family has moved between countries during their formative years. The term was developed by sociologist Ruth Hill Useem in the 1960s following her research into American families living in India in the 1950s, referring to the children who accompany their parents into another society. Although the term can apply to children whose parents have migrated and settled elsewhere, it is more commonly used to describe children who have grown up across multiple cultural environments.
For example, a child born in England to British parents might move to America at the age of three because of their parents’ work. Another TCK might be born in England, move to Germany at five, spend three years there, then move to France for four years before moving to Canada at age twelve. For many TCKs, moving between countries several times during childhood can mean developing connections to several different cultures without feeling that they fully belong to any one of them.
There is no single TCK experience. Families may move because of military or diplomatic postings, employment, humanitarian or missionary work, or other circumstances, meaning each person’s experience of culture and belonging can be different. Some TCKs may hold one passport but have spent most or all of their childhood in another country, while others may have multiple passports and feel caught between different cultural identities. Some may find that their strongest sense of connection comes not from a particular country, but from relationships with other TCKs who have experienced similar transitions.
The idea of a third culture does not refer to a literal third country or culture. Instead, it describes an in-between cultural space that develops from the different cultures a TCK has experienced. This space can be influenced by the cultures they have grown up around while also becoming something unique to them. An airport can be a useful analogy: it is a place where people have left somewhere and are on their way somewhere else. For some TCKs, this sense of being between places can feel familiar and may contribute to where they experience a sense of belonging.
Questions such as Where are you from? or Where is home? can therefore be more complicated for TCKs than they may appear. Someone who has lived in several countries, moved frequently or holds multiple passports may struggle to give a simple answer that captures their experiences. They may feel connected to several places while also feeling that none of them fully represents what home means to them. TCKs may live in a country they know can never be home, while also knowing that they will eventually leave.
For some TCKs, a sense of belonging may come most strongly from connecting with other people who have had similar experiences. These people may not have lived in the same countries, attended the same schools or shared the same cultural background, but may recognise the experience of moving, adapting and living between cultures. This shared understanding can create a sense of familiarity and belonging that is not necessarily tied to one particular place.
Impacts of being a CCK
Growing up with meaningful experiences of more than one culture can provide CCKs with valuable skills, including cultural awareness, adaptability and the ability to understand different perspectives. However, navigating multiple cultural environments during childhood can also create challenges around identity, belonging and relationships. A CCK may sometimes feel caught between different cultural expectations or unsure about which parts of each culture feel most like their own. They may feel pressure to adapt their behaviour depending on who they are with, particularly when different family, social or cultural environments have different expectations about communication, relationships, behaviour or identity.
CCKs may also experience a sense of not fully belonging to any one cultural group, particularly if their experiences are different from those of peers who have grown up within a single cultural environment. They may feel misunderstood when others assume that they should identify strongly with one particular culture, or may find questions about where they are really from difficult to answer. Moving between cultural environments or regularly navigating different cultural expectations can also require significant emotional and social adjustment. At times, this may contribute to feelings of isolation, confusion or frustration, particularly when a CCK feels that other people do not understand the complexity of their background.
Many CCKs develop strong interpersonal skills, cultural curiosity, flexibility and an ability to communicate across different cultural contexts. The impact of growing up across cultures can depend on factors such as the individual’s family relationships, stability, community support, experiences of discrimination or acceptance, and how much freedom they have had to develop their own sense of identity. For some people, their multicultural background becomes an important and positive part of who they are, while others may need more time and support to understand how the different parts of their cultural identity fit together.
Impacts of being a TCK
Being a Third Culture Kid can bring valuable experiences and adaptability, but repeatedly moving between countries and cultures can also have emotional and social impacts. TCKs may experience unprocessed emotions following repeated moves, particularly when there is little opportunity to properly grieve the loss of familiar people, places, routines and communities before having to adapt to a new environment. They may also have limited wider social support, as repeatedly starting at new schools and entering new communities can mean having to rebuild relationships and work out which people they can trust. At the same time, TCKs can sometimes feel unseen or misunderstood because others focus on the perceived positives of travelling and living abroad, such as assuming that frequent flights and new countries are always exciting, while overlooking the difficulties or different circumstances behind the experience. Some TCKs may instead have grown up with significant financial or practical limitations, such as children of missionaries or humanitarian workers.
Repeated moves can also contribute to feelings of helplessness or a lack of autonomy, particularly when decisions about where and when to move are made because of a parent’s work rather than the child’s own choice. Having to repeatedly adapt to new environments may lead some TCKs to become highly skilled at changing how they behave to fit different social and cultural contexts. Although this adaptability can be valuable, constantly becoming a social chameleon may sometimes make it harder to recognise their own interests, preferences and sense of identity. Repeated experiences of leaving people and places can also influence how someone approaches stability and long-term relationships, with some TCKs finding it difficult to settle down or feeling hesitant about becoming deeply attached to people, places or commitments because they have learned to expect that things will eventually change or end.
How to help myself
Notice situations where navigating different cultural expectations feels difficult and give yourself time to work out what feels comfortable for you. It can help to ask questions when you are unsure about an unfamiliar social expectation rather than feeling that you are expected to understand everything immediately. Keeping track of situations that leave you feeling overwhelmed, misunderstood or out of place can also help you recognise patterns and identify what you may need in those moments.
Give yourself permission to set boundaries around conversations about your background. You do not have to explain your experiences, answer personal questions or share details about your family and culture simply because someone is curious. It can also help to recognise that you may communicate, behave or express yourself differently depending on the situation without this meaning that you are being inauthentic. Try to focus on what feels genuine and comfortable for you rather than feeling pressure to meet other people’s expectations of what your cultural identity should look like.
For CCKs, give yourself time to explore what your different cultural experiences mean to you. You do not have to choose one culture or feel equally connected to every part of your background. Talking with trusted family members or friends about your experiences, learning more about your different cultural influences and keeping meaningful traditions can help you develop a stronger sense of identity and belonging. It can also be useful to notice when you feel pressure to change how you behave to fit into different environments and give yourself permission to be yourself across different cultural settings.
Build connections with people who respect and understand the different parts of your background. This might include friends, cultural communities, school or university groups, or other people with similar experiences. If you experience misunderstanding, discrimination or pressure because of your cultural background, speaking to someone you trust can help. Remember that there is no single right way to experience or express a multicultural identity, and it is okay for your relationship with different cultures to change as you grow.
For TCKs, give yourself permission to acknowledge the emotions that can come with moving between countries and cultures. It can be helpful to recognise feelings of sadness, homesickness, frustration or uncertainty rather than feeling that you should simply adapt and move on. Keeping in touch with people who know you well, maintaining meaningful traditions and routines, and keeping photographs or objects that connect you to important people and places can provide a sense of continuity. Journalling can also help you process experiences and make sense of how different places and cultures have shaped you.
Try to explore your own identity rather than feeling pressured to choose one culture or explain exactly where you are from. Your identity can include different cultures, languages, experiences and communities, and it can change over time. Connecting with other TCKs can provide a sense of understanding and belonging, particularly when you are struggling to explain experiences that others may not relate to. It can also help to build stable relationships and support networks wherever you are living, while remembering that it is okay to ask for help when repeated transitions become emotionally difficult.
How to help a loved one
Try to understand their experiences without making assumptions about what growing up across cultures has been like for them. Give them space to talk about both positive and difficult experiences without suggesting that they should feel grateful, lucky or unhappy because of their background. Someone can appreciate aspects of their multicultural experiences while also finding parts of them difficult. Avoid expecting them to represent, explain or speak for a particular culture, and respect their boundaries if they do not want to discuss personal or cultural experiences.
Be patient when they are navigating unfamiliar social situations, expectations or environments. What feels obvious or familiar to you may not feel the same to them, and they may need time to work out how they want to respond. Try not to make assumptions about where they feel comfortable or what they consider normal. Instead, ask what would make a situation easier and listen to their answer. It can also help to recognise that their experiences may change over time and that they may relate differently to different aspects of their cultural background as they grow older.
For a CCK, recognise that their experience of different cultures may come through family life, community, education, friendships or other meaningful interactions rather than repeated international moves. Avoid assuming that they identify strongly with one particular culture or that they will automatically feel equally connected to every part of their background. Ask how they describe their own cultural experiences and use the language they choose.
CCKs may sometimes experience different expectations depending on the cultural environment they are in. For example, expectations around communication, family relationships, independence, behaviour or social situations may differ between home, school and wider communities. Rather than expecting them to choose one way of behaving, help create an environment where they can talk about these differences without feeling that one part of their background is more valid than another.
For a TCK, recognise that repeated moves can involve significant loss as well as opportunity. Avoid assuming that moving somewhere new is always exciting because of the opportunity to travel or experience another country. Leaving friends, schools, communities, routines and familiar places can be difficult, even when the move was positive for the wider family. Give them opportunities to say goodbye and acknowledge what they are leaving behind rather than immediately focusing on the new environment.
Where possible, give a TCK some involvement in decisions that affect their everyday life. They may have had little control over where they lived, when they moved or when they had to leave people behind because these decisions were linked to their parents’ work. Offering choices about smaller aspects of their life can help them develop a greater sense of control. It can also be helpful to remember important transitions and anniversaries, as these may bring up emotions connected to previous moves even when they appear to have adjusted well.
For both TCKs and CCKs, avoid comparing their experiences with someone else’s or assuming that two people with multicultural backgrounds will have the same relationship with culture. Pay attention to how they describe their own experiences and be willing to learn from them. Most importantly, offer the same patience, respect and acceptance that you would want anyone to receive when they are trying to understand themselves and navigate the different environments around them.
Allow losses to be losses rather than immediately trying to find a positive side to a difficult experience. Moving can involve genuine grief, and children may need permission to feel sad, angry, disappointed or unsettled without being encouraged to focus on the exciting opportunities that come with a new place. Giving these feelings space can help a child feel that their losses are being taken seriously rather than dismissed or minimised.
Expect emotional setbacks during periods of adjustment and recognise that adapting to a new environment is not always a straightforward process. A child may temporarily show changes in behaviour, become more withdrawn or appear to regress while they adjust, and these difficulties may come and go over time. If significant regressive behaviours or emotional difficulties continue for longer than around 3–6 months, consider seeking professional support through their school or organisations with experience supporting TCKs.
Parents and carers can also benefit from learning more about grief, transitions and the experiences of TCKs, including taking time to reflect on and process their own feelings about repeated moves. Having a better understanding of their own responses can make it easier to recognise what their child may be experiencing and respond without unintentionally dismissing or rushing their emotions. Connecting with organisations and communities specialising in TCK experiences can also provide additional information, resources and support for families.
Make space for the glorious and — the idea that a child can hold multiple parts of their identity at the same time, even when those experiences appear to conflict. For example, a child can hold a British passport and still feel disconnected from aspects of British culture, or feel strongly connected to more than one country without feeling completely at home in either. They do not need to choose one identity or make their experiences fit neatly into a single category, and being able to hold these different parts of themselves can be an important part of understanding who they are.
Myth Buster
Myth: Being a TCK means you must have lived in lots of different countries
Truth: TCK experiences vary. Some people move between several countries, while others may spend most of their childhood in one country while regularly experiencing a different cultural environment through their family or community.
Myth: TCKs are always privileged because they get to travel
Truth: Living across cultures can provide valuable experiences, but it can also involve loss, disruption, financial difficulties, loneliness and limited control over where someone lives. You cannot understand someone’s experience simply by looking at the countries they have lived in.
Truth: Living across cultures can provide valuable experiences, but it can also involve loss, disruption, financial difficulties, loneliness and limited control over where someone lives. You cannot understand someone’s experience simply by looking at the countries they have lived in.
Myth: CCKs and TCKs are basically the same thing
Truth: TCK and CCK describe overlapping but different experiences. TCK generally refers to someone who spends a significant part of childhood living outside their parents’ or passport culture, often within a transient lifestyle. CCK is a broader term for someone who has meaningful interaction with more than one culture before the age of 18.
Myth: TCKs and CCKs should know exactly where they are from
Truth: Growing up across cultures can make questions such as “where are you from?” or “where is home?” more complicated. Someone may have connections to several places without feeling that one country completely describes where they are from or where they feel at home.
Myth: Being exposed to different cultures automatically makes someone culturally confident
Truth: Growing up across cultures can help develop adaptability and cultural awareness, but it can also involve uncertainty, cultural misunderstandings and pressure to adapt. Someone can be comfortable navigating different cultures while still finding aspects of their identity or belonging difficult.
Myth: TCKs and CCKs will always struggle with their identity
Truth: Cultural identity develops differently for everyone. Some people may experience uncertainty or conflict, while others feel comfortable with their multicultural identity. Experiences can also change over time as someone grows and encounters new environments.
Myth: Moving around means you don’t form meaningful relationships
Truth: TCKs and CCKs can develop strong and meaningful relationships. However, repeated moves or different cultural environments can sometimes affect how someone experiences friendships, separation and long-term connections.
Myth: If someone enjoyed growing up across cultures, it can’t have affected their mental health
Truth: Positive and difficult experiences can exist at the same time. Someone can value their multicultural background while also experiencing grief, stress, loneliness or difficulties with identity and belonging.
Myth: There is one right way to identify as a TCK or CCK
Truth: Everyone’s experience of culture and identity is different. A person may identify strongly with one culture, several cultures, none of them, or use different language to describe themselves over time. Individual preference and experience matter.
Impacts on your mental health
Growing up across different cultures can be a positive and enriching experience, but navigating different environments, expectations and identities can also affect emotional wellbeing. For some TCKs, repeated moves can involve ongoing experiences of change and loss, including leaving behind friends, schools, communities, familiar routines and places. Having to repeatedly adapt to new environments while having limited control over when or where a move happens can contribute to stress, uncertainty and feelings of helplessness.
For both TCKs and CCKs, navigating different cultural expectations can sometimes make it difficult to develop a clear sense of identity or belonging. Someone may feel connected to several cultures while also feeling that they do not completely fit into any one of them. They may also change how they communicate or behave depending on the environment they are in, which can become tiring when they feel pressure to constantly adapt. Questions such as Where are you from? or assumptions about someone’s cultural identity can sometimes leave them feeling misunderstood or unseen.
These experiences do not mean that being a TCK or CCK will cause mental health difficulties. Many people develop valuable strengths from growing up across cultures, including adaptability, cultural awareness and the ability to understand different perspectives. However, when experiences of transition, loss, isolation, identity or cultural pressure become difficult to manage, they may contribute to difficulties such as anxiety, low mood, loneliness or stress. Having stable relationships, opportunities to process experiences and access to appropriate support can help protect emotional wellbeing.
What can help
Support can be helpful when experiences of moving between cultures, adapting to different environments or navigating cultural identity begin to affect someone’s emotional wellbeing, relationships, education or everyday life. Speaking to a trusted adult, friend, teacher, pastoral lead, school counsellor or other professional can provide a space to talk through experiences without having to simplify or justify them.
For TCKs, schools and other education settings can be particularly useful sources of support, especially during or after an international move. Teachers, pastoral staff and school counsellors may be able to provide additional support with transitions, changes in friendships, settling into a new environment and emotional difficulties. TCK-specific organisations and communities can also provide information, resources and opportunities to connect with other people who have experienced similar transitions.
For CCKs, support may be available through schools, universities, community organisations, cultural groups or other services already involved in their lives. If someone is experiencing difficulties with identity, relationships, discrimination, anxiety, low mood or feeling overwhelmed by different cultural expectations, they can also seek support from a GP or mental health professional. Support does not need to be specific to TCK or CCK experiences to be useful; what matters is having someone willing to listen and understand the individual’s circumstances.
If experiences of cultural transition or identity are having a significant or persistent impact on someone’s wellbeing, professional support may be appropriate. A person does not need to wait until they are struggling severely before asking for help.
Therapy Interventions
Therapy can provide a space to explore the emotional impact of growing up across different cultures, particularly when someone is experiencing difficulties with identity, belonging, grief, relationships or adjusting to change. There is no specific therapy that someone needs simply because they are a TCK or CCK, and therapy should be guided by the individual’s needs and experiences.
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) – Can help someone explore connections between their thoughts, feelings and behaviours, including unhelpful beliefs about themselves, belonging or adapting to new situations.
- Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) – Can support someone to make space for difficult emotions while developing a clearer understanding of their values and what is meaningful to them.
- Counselling – Provides a supportive space to talk through experiences such as grief, identity, transitions, relationships and difficulties adjusting to different environments.
- Systemic or Family Therapy – Can be helpful when cultural transitions are affecting family relationships or when different family members have different experiences or expectations around culture, identity and belonging.
- Trauma-Focused Therapy – May be appropriate where someone has experienced traumatic events alongside their cross-cultural experiences. The focus would be on the trauma itself rather than being a TCK or CCK.
- Psychoeducation – Can help individuals and families understand the emotional and psychological experiences that can occur when growing up across different cultures, including adjustment, grief and identity development.
Helplines
NHS 111 (Option 2)
NHS 111 is an NHS service providing urgent medical and mental health advice and support. It can help with mental health concerns, emotional distress, anxiety, low mood, suicidal thoughts and other urgent health problems.
Phone: For mental health support, call 111 and select the mental health option (option 2).
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Samaritans
Samaritans is a charity providing emotional support to anyone who is struggling to cope or needs someone to talk to. They are there for people experiencing all sorts of difficulties, including stress, anxiety, loneliness, relationship or family problems, bereavement, feeling overwhelmed and concerns about mental health or suicide.
Phone: 116 123
Opening times: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
Website: www.samaritans.org
Shout
Shout is a free, confidential text messaging service that provides support to anyone who is struggling to cope. It can help with a wide range of issues, including stress, anxiety, low mood, loneliness, relationship difficulties, bullying, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, feeling overwhelmed and other mental health challenges.
Text: SHOUT to 85258
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
Website: http://www.giveusashout.org
Mind
Mind is a mental health charity providing information, advice and support for people experiencing mental health difficulties. They cover a wide range of mental health and wellbeing issues, including anxiety, depression, stress, relationships, loneliness, coping with difficult experiences and managing everyday life. Mind provides information to help people understand what they are experiencing, know their rights, find appropriate support and feel less alone.
Phone: 0300 123 3393
Opening times: 9am–6pm, Monday to Friday (excluding bank holidays)
Email: info@mind.org.uk
Website: www.mind.org.uk
YoungMinds
YoungMinds is a national charity supporting the mental health and wellbeing of children and young people. They provide information, advice and support for parents and carers who are concerned about a young person’s mental health, and help people understand mental health difficulties, find appropriate support and access useful resources. Their Parents Helpline can provide information, advice, emotional support and signposting to other services.
Parent helpline: 0808 802 5544 (9:30 am – 4 pm on Mondays, Thursdays and Fridays, and from 9:30 am – 6 pm on Tuesdays and Wednesdays)
Email: parents@youngminds.org.uk
Webchat: https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/parents-helpline/
Childline
Childline is a free service for young people to talk to a counsellor about anything. The service is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Childline is available to anybody who is 18 years old or younger.
Phone: 0800 1111
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
You can also find helpful resources, speak to a counsellor online or send a message on their site.
Website: www.childline.org.uk
For adults concerned about a child, the NSPCC can be contacted
NSPCC
NSPCC is a children’s charity that works to protect children and prevent abuse and neglect. They provide support and advice for adults about child abuse, neglect, child safety, online safety and children’s mental and emotional wellbeing.
Phone: 0808 800 5000
Opening times: 10 am–4 pm, Monday–Friday
Email: help@nspcc.org.uk
Email opening times: 11 am–4 pm, 7 days a week
Website: www.nspcc.org.uk
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably)
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) is a charity providing support for people who are struggling with their mental health or experiencing emotional distress. They support people with issues including low mood, anxiety, loneliness, stress, suicidal thoughts and difficult life experiences.
Phone: 0800 58 58 58
Opening times: 5pm–midnight, every day
Webchat: 5pm–midnight, every day
WhatsApp: Available through the CALM website
Website: www.thecalmzone.net
