Summary
The choices we make in our everyday lives can influence our physical health, mental wellbeing, relationships and overall quality of life. Lifestyle choices include how we eat, sleep, move our bodies, manage stress, spend our free time, interact with others and respond to challenges. They can also involve decisions about alcohol, smoking, vaping and other substances, how we use technology and social media, and how we balance responsibilities with rest and enjoyment. Although these choices can affect our wellbeing, they are not made in isolation. Our circumstances, finances, family life, culture, environment, education, work, physical health and access to support can all influence the options available to us. This means that making healthy choices will look different for everyone, and not every aspect of our lifestyle will be within our control.
Our physical and mental wellbeing are closely connected. Physical health can influence our mood, concentration, energy and ability to cope with everyday demands, while emotional difficulties can affect our sleep, appetite, motivation and physical comfort. For example, ongoing stress may make it harder to sleep or eat regularly, while feeling exhausted can make responsibilities seem more difficult to manage. Spending time outdoors, enjoying hobbies, connecting with others and being physically active may help some people feel calmer, more energised or more connected. In contrast, consistently missing out on rest, feeling isolated or relying on alcohol or other substances to manage difficult emotions may affect wellbeing over time. These connections are not always straightforward, and experiencing physical or mental health difficulties does not necessarily mean someone has made poor lifestyle choices.
Lifestyle choices can also affect our sense of independence, confidence and satisfaction with life. Developing routines, pursuing interests, building supportive relationships and making time for activities that matter to us can help create a sense of purpose and balance. However, it is easy to become caught up in the idea that we should always be productive, exercise regularly, eat perfectly, socialise often and manage every responsibility without difficulty. Social media can add to this pressure by presenting idealised versions of other people’s lives, bodies and routines. In reality, wellbeing does not mean meeting every expectation or maintaining the same habits every day. It involves recognising your needs, understanding your priorities and finding ways to look after yourself that are realistic and sustainable.
Some lifestyle choices may provide immediate enjoyment or relief while having more complicated effects over time. For example, staying up late, spending long periods online or using alcohol to unwind may feel helpful in the moment, but these habits can sometimes affect sleep, mood, concentration or relationships. This does not mean that you should feel guilty about enjoying yourself or that every decision needs to be carefully controlled. Rather, it can be helpful to consider how your habits affect you overall, whether they are helping you meet your needs and whether there are alternative ways to achieve the same outcome. Understanding why you make particular choices can help you decide whether you want to maintain them, make adjustments or seek support.
Making positive lifestyle changes does not need to involve completely changing your daily life. Small, manageable adjustments can be a useful starting point, such as developing a more consistent sleep routine, finding an enjoyable way to move your body, making time for hobbies, reducing habits that leave you feeling worse or setting aside opportunities to relax. It can help to focus on changes that matter to you personally rather than following someone else’s routine or trying to improve everything at once. Some changes may take time to become habits, and setbacks are a normal part of the process. You may need to try different approaches before finding something that works for you, and your priorities may change as your circumstances change.
Keeping well is not about making the “right” choice every time, avoiding all unhealthy habits or having complete control over your circumstances. It is about developing an understanding of how your daily choices affect you, recognising what supports your wellbeing and making informed decisions where you can. This includes knowing when to ask for help, allowing yourself time to rest and accepting that some days will be more difficult than others. The aim is to find a balance that supports your health, helps you manage life’s demands and allows you to enjoy the things that are important to you.
How to help myself
Looking at your current habits can help you identify which parts of your lifestyle support your wellbeing and which you might want to change. Think about how you feel throughout the day, how well you sleep, whether you have enough energy, how you manage stress and whether you have time for activities you enjoy. You could keep a simple record of your routines for a few days to notice any patterns, such as feeling more tired after a poor night’s sleep or feeling calmer after spending time outdoors. Try to approach this with curiosity rather than criticism. Lifestyle choices are not always completely within your control, and recognising the barriers you face can help you identify changes that are achievable.
Eating a balanced and varied diet can help provide the nutrients your body needs to function well. Try to eat regularly and include a variety of foods, such as fruit and vegetables, wholegrains, protein sources and foods containing healthy fats. Staying hydrated throughout the day can also support concentration and physical health. You do not need to follow a strict diet or avoid foods you enjoy to look after yourself. If you have a busy routine, limited access to food or difficulties with appetite, consider what practical changes might help, such as planning meals, keeping easy-to-prepare options available or setting reminders to eat. If you have specific dietary or medical needs, seek advice from an appropriate healthcare professional.
Sleep is another important part of a healthy lifestyle. Try to develop a routine that allows you to get enough rest and, where possible, go to bed and wake up at reasonably consistent times. Having a relaxing activity before bed, keeping your sleeping environment comfortable and allowing time to wind down after a busy day may help. Screens, caffeine, stress and irregular schedules can affect sleep for some people, although individual needs vary. If you regularly struggle to sleep, feel exhausted during the day or find that sleep difficulties are affecting your daily life, consider speaking to your GP.
Physical activity can support your physical health, improve sleep and help you manage stress. It does not have to involve intense exercise or going to the gym. Walking, dancing, cycling, swimming, gardening, playing sports or stretching at home can all be ways to move your body. Choose activities that you enjoy and that are suitable for your health, mobility and circumstances. If you find it difficult to get started, try setting a small goal, such as taking a short walk or incorporating movement into an activity you already do. It may be easier to maintain a habit when it feels enjoyable and achievable rather than like another responsibility. Remember that rest is also important, and you should adapt activity to your needs.
Making time for activities that you enjoy can help you maintain a sense of balance. Hobbies, creative activities, time outdoors, reading, listening to music and spending time with people you care about can provide opportunities to relax and feel connected to your interests. It can be easy to prioritise work, education or other responsibilities while putting enjoyable activities aside, particularly when you feel stressed or busy. Try to make space for activities that give you a sense of enjoyment, achievement or purpose, even if you can only spend a short amount of time on them. You do not need to be productive for an activity to be worthwhile.
Managing stress is also an important part of making lifestyle choices that support wellbeing. Stress can affect sleep, appetite, concentration, mood and physical tension. Notice the situations that tend to leave you feeling overwhelmed and consider whether there are changes you can make. You might break large tasks into smaller steps, plan ahead, take regular breaks, practise relaxation, spend time outdoors or speak to someone you trust. Setting boundaries can also help you protect your time and energy. For example, you may need to limit additional commitments when you already have a lot to manage or take a break from social media if it is affecting your mood. If stress is persistent or difficult to manage, professional support may help you understand what is contributing to it and explore ways of coping.
The choices you make around alcohol, smoking, vaping and other substances can affect your health and wellbeing. Alcohol and other substances may sometimes be used to relax, socialise or cope with difficult feelings, but they can also affect sleep, mood, concentration, physical health and relationships. Smoking and vaping are not risk-free, and nicotine can lead to dependence. If you are concerned about your use of a substance, try to consider how it affects you and whether it is becoming a main way of managing stress or emotions. You do not need to wait until a problem becomes severe before seeking advice. A GP or appropriate support service can help you explore your options without judgement.
Social media and technology can also influence lifestyle choices. They can help you stay connected, access information and enjoy entertainment, but spending a lot of time online may sometimes affect sleep, concentration, self-esteem or how you feel about your own life. Comparing yourself with carefully selected images of other people’s lives can create unrealistic expectations about appearance, success, relationships or lifestyle. Consider how different online spaces make you feel and whether you want to change the amount of time you spend on them, adjust your feed or take breaks from particular accounts. Technology does not have to be harmful, and the aim is to find a balance that allows you to benefit from it without feeling overwhelmed.
Your relationships and social environment can also influence your choices. Spending time with people who respect and support you can make it easier to look after yourself, while peer pressure or fear of being judged may make it harder to make decisions that feel right for you. You may find yourself agreeing to things you do not want to do, taking part in activities because others are doing them or comparing your lifestyle with your friends’. Practising how to say no, setting boundaries and identifying people you feel comfortable talking to can help you make decisions that reflect your own needs and values. It is okay for your choices to differ from those of the people around you.
It can be helpful to set realistic goals when making changes. Rather than trying to improve every aspect of your lifestyle at once, choose one or two areas that matter most to you. For example, you might aim to prepare breakfast on more mornings, go outside during your lunch break or establish a regular time to wind down before bed. Think about what might make the change easier, how you will fit it into your routine and what you can do if things do not go to plan. If you miss a day or return to an old habit, it does not mean you have failed. You can reflect on what made the change difficult and try a different approach. Lifestyle changes are more likely to be sustainable when they fit your life and reflect your own priorities.
How to help a loved one
Supporting someone to make lifestyle changes starts with understanding their needs and circumstances. It can be tempting to offer advice or point out habits that you think they should change, but this may leave them feeling criticised or pressured. Instead, ask how they are feeling, listen to what they find difficult and explore whether they would like support. Someone may want help developing a routine, finding an activity they enjoy or managing stress, while another person may simply need someone to listen. Respecting their choices and allowing them to make decisions at their own pace can help them feel more in control.
You can offer practical support by making healthy activities easier to access. For example, you could cook together, go for a walk, try a new hobby, plan a relaxing activity or help them organise their week. If they are struggling with motivation, suggesting a small activity that you can do together may feel less overwhelming than encouraging them to change several habits at once. Try to make activities enjoyable rather than presenting them as tasks they must complete. Recognise their efforts without expecting immediate results, and remember that progress may be gradual.
It is also helpful to consider the circumstances that may be affecting someone’s lifestyle. Financial pressures, caring responsibilities, work or education demands, physical health difficulties, disability, low mood and anxiety can all make certain choices harder. For example, someone who is exhausted may struggle to exercise, while someone experiencing low mood may find preparing meals or maintaining personal care difficult. Rather than assuming that a person lacks motivation, ask whether there are barriers you could help them address. Practical support, understanding and flexibility may be more useful than simply telling someone to make healthier choices.
If you are concerned about a loved one’s use of alcohol, nicotine or other substances, approach the conversation calmly and without judgement. Focus on what you have noticed and how it may be affecting them, rather than labelling them or making accusations. You could explain that you are concerned about their wellbeing and ask whether they would like to talk about it. Avoid trying to force them to change or taking responsibility for managing the problem yourself. If their substance use is affecting their health, safety or daily life, encourage them to speak to a GP or an appropriate support service.
For parents/guardians supporting a young person, it can help to model balanced lifestyle habits while allowing them increasing independence as they grow. Encourage regular meals, sufficient sleep, enjoyable movement, hobbies, social connection and time to relax, without making wellbeing feel like a set of rules they must follow perfectly. Discuss the influence of social media, peer pressure, alcohol, vaping and other substances in an open and age-appropriate way. If a young person is struggling with their routine or motivation, work with them to understand what is getting in the way and identify changes they feel ready to make. Avoid focusing on weight, appearance or comparisons with others; prioritise health, enjoyment and how they feel.
Remember to look after your own wellbeing when supporting someone else. You may be able to encourage and assist them, but you cannot make every decision for them or control the outcome. Set boundaries when needed, make time for your own interests and seek support if you feel worried or overwhelmed. A supportive relationship can encourage positive change, but both people need space for their own needs and choices.
Myth Buster
Myth: You have to change your entire lifestyle to be healthier
Truth: Small, realistic changes can support wellbeing over time. You can start with one habit that feels achievable rather than trying to change everything at once.
Myth: Healthy living is only about diet and exercise
Truth: Lifestyle choices also include sleep, stress management, relationships, enjoyable activities, social media use and how you respond to challenges. All of these can influence wellbeing.
Myth: If you have an unhealthy habit, you just need more willpower
Truth: Habits are influenced by many factors, including stress, routines, environment, finances and emotional wellbeing. Understanding what makes a habit difficult to change can help you find a more realistic approach.
Myth: You must exercise intensely for it to count
Truth: Movement comes in many forms. Walking, dancing, gardening, swimming and other activities can all support health, depending on your needs and abilities.
Myth: You should never eat foods that are considered unhealthy
Truth: A balanced approach to food does not require perfection or strict rules. Eating well is about nourishing your body overall, not feeling guilty about individual foods.
Myth: Resting means you are being lazy
Truth: Rest is important for physical recovery, concentration and emotional wellbeing. A balanced lifestyle includes both activity and opportunities to recover.
Myth: Everyone should follow the same healthy routine
Truth: People have different health needs, responsibilities, preferences and circumstances. What works for one person may not work for another, so lifestyle choices should be realistic and suited to the individual.
Myth: Alcohol or other substances are a good way to manage stress
Truth: Although substances may provide temporary relief for some people, they can also affect sleep, mood, physical health and relationships. There are other ways to manage stress, and support is available if substance use becomes difficult to control.
Myth: If you fall out of a routine, you have failed
Truth: Changes in routine are normal, especially during stressful or busy periods. You can adjust your plans, start again and learn from what made the routine difficult to maintain.
Myth: You should be able to make positive lifestyle changes on your own
Truth: Support from friends, family, healthcare professionals or relevant services can make change easier. Asking for help is a positive step towards looking after yourself.
Support
If you are finding it difficult to make lifestyle changes or are concerned about how your habits are affecting your wellbeing, you do not have to manage this alone. You could start by talking to someone you trust about what you are experiencing and what you would like to change. They may be able to offer encouragement, practical help or simply a listening ear. If you are unsure where to begin, think about the area of your lifestyle that is having the greatest impact on you and focus on getting support with that first.
Your GP can help with concerns about sleep, persistent tiredness, changes in appetite, physical health, low mood, anxiety or other difficulties that affect your daily life. They can discuss possible causes, offer advice and help you access appropriate support. If you are concerned about alcohol, nicotine or other substance use, a GP can also help you explore treatment and support options. You can seek help even if you are not sure whether your habits are causing a significant problem.
You may also be able to access support through your school, college, university, workplace, local community services or wellbeing programmes. Depending on your needs, this could include advice about physical activity, nutrition, stress management, sleep or emotional wellbeing. If you are finding it difficult to maintain changes because of financial pressures, caring responsibilities or other practical barriers, local advice and community services may be able to help you identify available options.
If lifestyle difficulties are connected to persistent anxiety, low mood, stress or other emotional challenges, psychological support may help you understand what is happening and develop ways of coping. You do not need to wait until you are in crisis before asking for help. If your physical or mental health is getting worse or is significantly affecting your daily life, seek appropriate professional advice.
Therapy interventions
Therapy can help people understand how their lifestyle choices, emotional wellbeing and daily circumstances influence one another. It can provide a supportive space to explore habits, recognise barriers to change and develop realistic ways of looking after themselves. The focus will depend on the person’s needs, goals and experiences. Therapy is not about telling someone how to live or expecting them to follow a perfect routine; it is about helping them make informed choices that support their wellbeing.
Different approaches can be combined and adapted to suit each person. Therapy may be offered individually, in a group or alongside other forms of support. It can be particularly helpful when lifestyle difficulties are linked to emotional distress, persistent stress, low mood, anxiety or substance use. Where physical health concerns are present, therapy can complement appropriate medical advice and treatment. The aim is to help people better understand themselves, build sustainable habits and make lifestyle choices that support their physical and mental wellbeing.
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) – this can help people understand the connections between their thoughts, feelings and behaviours. For example, someone who feels overwhelmed by work or education may think that they must complete everything perfectly, become anxious and then avoid starting tasks. This may lead to poor sleep, less time for enjoyable activities and further stress. CBT can help them identify this pattern, consider more balanced ways of thinking and break tasks into manageable steps. It may also support people to recognise habits that affect their wellbeing, such as withdrawing from activities when feeling low or using alcohol to cope with difficult emotions.
- Behavioural activation – this can help people who are experiencing low mood and have stopped taking part in activities that previously gave them enjoyment, achievement or connection. A therapist may help the person identify meaningful activities and gradually reintroduce them into their routine. For example, someone who has been spending most of their time at home might start by taking a short walk, preparing a meal or contacting a friend. The aim is to help the person rebuild a sense of routine and reconnect with activities that matter to them, rather than waiting until they feel motivated enough to begin.
- Mindfulness-based approaches – these can help people become more aware of their thoughts, feelings and physical sensations in the present moment. They may involve breathing exercises, grounding activities, guided meditation or gentle movement. For example, someone who frequently feels stressed and distracted may learn to pause, notice how they are feeling and bring their attention back to what they are doing. These approaches may help people respond more thoughtfully to stress, although mindfulness is not suitable or helpful for everyone in every situation.
- Stress management interventions- these can help people recognise what contributes to stress and develop practical ways of responding. This may include relaxation exercises, problem-solving, prioritising responsibilities, setting boundaries and making time for recovery. For example, someone who feels exhausted by competing responsibilities may work with a therapist to identify which tasks are essential, which can be delayed and where they could ask for help. They might also develop a routine that includes breaks and enjoyable activities rather than using all their time and energy on responsibilities.
- Motivational interviewing – this can help people explore their feelings about making a change, particularly when they feel uncertain or have mixed motivations. Rather than telling someone what they should do, the approach supports them to consider their own reasons for change, identify what matters to them and decide what steps they feel ready to take. For example, someone who is thinking about reducing their alcohol intake may explore the benefits they associate with drinking alongside the effects it has on their sleep, mood or relationships. This can help them make a decision that reflects their own priorities and identify realistic next steps.
- Compassion-focused approaches – these may be helpful for people who experience guilt, shame or harsh self-criticism about their lifestyle. Someone may blame themselves for struggling to exercise, eating irregularly or finding it difficult to maintain a routine. Therapy can help them understand the factors affecting their behaviour and develop a kinder, more balanced way of responding to setbacks. This can support them to make changes without relying on criticism or unrealistic expectations.
- Problem-solving approaches – these can help people identify practical barriers to healthier routines and work through possible solutions. For example, someone who wants to be more active but has limited time may explore ways to include movement in their existing routine, while someone who struggles to prepare meals may consider simple options that fit their budget and schedule. A therapist can help the person break a larger goal into smaller steps, consider what might get in the way and review what has or has not worked.
Helplines
Childline
Childline is a free service for young people to talk to a counsellor about anything. The service is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Childline is available to anybody who is 18 years old or younger.
Phone: 0800 1111
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
You can also find helpful resources, speak to a counsellor online or send a message on their site.
Website: www.childline.org.uk
For adults concerned about a child, the NSPCC can be contacted
NSPCC
NSPCC is a children’s charity that works to protect children and prevent abuse and neglect. They provide support and advice for adults about child abuse, neglect, child safety, online safety and children’s mental and emotional wellbeing.
Phone: 0808 800 5000
Opening times: 10 am–4 pm, Monday–Friday
Email: help@nspcc.org.uk
YoungMinds
YoungMinds is a national charity supporting the mental health and wellbeing of children and young people. They provide information, advice and support for parents and carers who are concerned about a young person’s mental health, and help people understand mental health difficulties, find appropriate support and access useful resources. Their Parents Helpline can provide information, advice, emotional support and signposting to other services.
Parent helpline: 0808 802 5544 (9:30 am – 4 pm on Mondays, Thursdays and Fridays, and from 9:30 am – 6 pm on Tuesdays and Wednesdays)
Email: parents@youngminds.org.uk
Webchat: https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/parents-helpline/
Shout
Shout is a free, confidential text messaging service that provides support to anyone who is struggling to cope. It can help with a wide range of issues, including stress, anxiety, low mood, loneliness, relationship difficulties, bullying, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, feeling overwhelmed and other mental health challenges.
Text: SHOUT to 85258
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
Website: http://www.giveusashout.org
Mind
Mind is a mental health charity providing information, advice and support for people experiencing mental health difficulties. They cover a wide range of mental health and wellbeing issues, including anxiety, depression, stress, relationships, loneliness, coping with difficult experiences and managing everyday life. Mind provides information to help people understand what they are experiencing, know their rights, find appropriate support and feel less alone.
Phone: 0300 123 3393
Opening times: 9am–6pm, Monday to Friday (excluding bank holidays)
Email: info@mind.org.uk
Website: www.mind.org.uk
Samaritans
Samaritans is a charity providing emotional support to anyone who is struggling to cope or needs someone to talk to. They are there for people experiencing all sorts of difficulties, including stress, anxiety, loneliness, relationship or family problems, bereavement, feeling overwhelmed and concerns about mental health or suicide.
Phone: 116 123
Opening times: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
Website: www.samaritans.org
NHS 111 (Option 2)
NHS 111 is an NHS service providing urgent medical and mental health advice and support. It can help with mental health concerns, emotional distress, anxiety, low mood, suicidal thoughts and other urgent health problems.
Phone: For mental health support, call 111 and select the mental health option (option 2)
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week
