Summary
A traumatic event is an experience that feels extremely frightening, threatening, overwhelming or distressing. It may involve a serious threat to your life, safety or physical wellbeing, or the life or safety of someone else. Traumatic experiences can include serious accidents, violence, abuse, neglect, sexual assault, domestic abuse, crime, natural disasters, terrorism, war, serious illness or injury, witnessing someone being seriously injured or killed, or the sudden or unexpected death of someone you care about.
You do not have to be directly physically harmed for an event to affect you. Witnessing something frightening, believing that someone you care about is in danger, or learning about a traumatic event affecting someone close to you can also have a significant emotional impact. Previous experiences can also influence how someone responds to a new traumatic event.
After a traumatic event, your brain and body may temporarily respond as though the danger is still present. This is part of the body’s natural survival response. You might feel constantly alert, easily startled or unable to relax. You may notice your heart beating faster, changes in breathing, sweating, shaking, muscle tension, nausea or other physical sensations. You may also experience strong emotions or changes in the way you think and behave.
Common emotional reactions include fear, anxiety, sadness, anger, guilt, shame, helplessness, confusion, irritability or feeling overwhelmed. Some people experience very little emotion at first and instead feel numb, detached or as though what happened was unreal. This does not mean that you are not affected. Sometimes the emotional impact becomes clearer once the immediate situation has passed.
You may experience intrusive memories, nightmares or unwanted thoughts about what happened. You might find yourself replaying parts of the event, imagining what could have happened differently or becoming distressed by reminders. You may also avoid people, places, conversations, activities, sounds, smells or other things that remind you of the event.
Trauma can affect concentration, memory and decision-making. You might find it difficult to focus at school, college or work, forget things more easily or struggle to complete tasks that would normally feel straightforward. Sleep can also be affected, including difficulty falling asleep, waking during the night or having disturbing dreams.
Your behaviour may change too. You might withdraw from people, become more irritable, stop doing activities you normally enjoy, feel constantly busy because being still feels uncomfortable, or become more cautious about situations that previously felt safe. Some people may use alcohol, drugs, self-harm or other behaviours to try to manage overwhelming emotions.
These reactions can be frightening, but experiencing them after a traumatic event does not automatically mean that you have PTSD or another mental health condition. Many trauma reactions are temporary and gradually reduce as someone feels safer and has time to recover.
There is no single correct way to respond to trauma. Two people who experience the same event may react very differently. You may also react differently from how you expected yourself to react. Recovery can involve good days and difficult days, and symptoms can sometimes fluctuate rather than improving in a straight line.
How to help myself
Your first priority after a traumatic event is physical safety. If the danger is still present, move somewhere safe if you can. If you have been injured or someone else needs urgent medical attention, seek help from the emergency services. If the traumatic event involves another person who may continue to pose a risk to you, think about where you can safely go and who you can contact. You do not have to manage an unsafe situation alone. If you are a child or young person, tell a trusted adult what has happened if you can. This could be a parent, carer, teacher, youth worker, healthcare professional or another adult you trust. If the person responsible for the event is someone you live with or someone you would normally turn to for help, it is particularly important to identify another safe adult or professional.
Immediately after something traumatic, you may feel confused, disconnected or unable to think clearly. Your body may still be in a heightened state of alert, and you may find it difficult to understand what you are feeling. Try not to expect yourself to make major decisions, explain everything or immediately return to your normal routine. Focus on getting somewhere safe, being with supportive people and meeting your basic needs. You may also notice that your memory of the event is unclear or fragmented. This can happen when someone is extremely frightened or overwhelmed. Do not feel that you have to force yourself to remember every detail.
Trauma can make basic self-care feel surprisingly difficult. Try to eat something, drink enough fluids, get some rest and take any medication that has been prescribed for you. You may not have much appetite or may struggle to sleep, particularly during the first few days. Rather than expecting yourself to return immediately to your usual routine, focus on small, manageable steps. If you are finding everyday tasks difficult, ask someone you trust to help. Practical support with food, transport, appointments, shopping, schoolwork or household responsibilities can reduce pressure while you recover.
It can be tempting to isolate yourself after something frightening has happened. You might feel that other people will not understand, worry about being a burden or simply not want to talk. You do not have to talk about the traumatic event to stay connected. Spending time with someone you trust, watching something together, going for a walk or simply sitting with someone can help you feel less alone. Let people know what kind of support you want. You might want someone to listen, help you with practical things, distract you, check in regularly or give you some space.
Talking about a traumatic experience can be helpful for some people, but you should not feel pressured to tell your story before you are ready. If you want to talk, choose someone who makes you feel safe and listened to. You can decide how much detail you want to share. You do not owe anyone a full explanation of what happened. You may find it easier to speak to a healthcare professional, particularly if you are worried about your reactions or do not feel able to talk to people you know personally.
After trauma, familiar routines can provide a sense of safety and predictability. Where possible, continue with everyday activities such as getting up at a similar time, eating regular meals, attending school or work when you feel able, spending time with supportive people and doing activities you normally enjoy. You may need to temporarily reduce your expectations. It is okay if you cannot do everything you normally would. Returning gradually to normal activities can be more manageable than expecting yourself to immediately function exactly as you did before.
You may encounter things that remind you of what happened. These might include locations, people, sounds, smells, news reports, social media posts or particular dates. It is understandable to want to avoid reminders immediately after trauma. However, completely avoiding everything connected to the event can sometimes make reminders feel increasingly threatening. You do not need to deliberately expose yourself to distressing reminders on your own. If avoidance is becoming a major part of your life, a mental health professional can help you approach reminders safely and gradually.
After a traumatic event, you may repeatedly check news reports, social media posts, videos or messages about what happened. You might feel that you need to know everything or that checking will help you feel more prepared. Repeated exposure to distressing images, videos and discussions can sometimes increase anxiety and keep your body in a heightened state of alert. Consider taking breaks from coverage and muting or unfollowing content that is making you more distressed. You can stay informed without repeatedly exposing yourself to graphic or upsetting material.
You may look for ways to switch off from what happened. Alcohol, drugs, excessive gaming, self-harm, risky behaviour or completely withdrawing from other people can sometimes provide temporary relief. Although these behaviours may feel helpful in the moment, they can create additional difficulties and may interfere with recovery. If you are relying on a particular behaviour to manage your emotions, it may be worth talking to someone about what you are experiencing rather than dealing with it alone.
You may experience emotions that seem to contradict each other. You might feel frightened but also angry. You might feel sad but also relieved. You might feel guilty because you survived when someone else did not. You might even experience moments of happiness after something terrible has happened. Having moments where you laugh, enjoy yourself or carry on with everyday life does not mean that you do not care about what happened. Similarly, feeling upset does not mean that you are failing to cope. There is no correct emotional response to trauma.
Do not blame yourself for what happened. After trauma, people sometimes replay the event and think about what they could have done differently. You may find yourself thinking that you should have acted differently, noticed something sooner or prevented what happened. Try to remember that decisions made during frightening situations are influenced by the information, circumstances and resources available at the time.
Ask for professional support if you are struggling. You do not need to wait until your symptoms become severe or receive a diagnosis before asking for help. Speak to your GP, a healthcare professional, school, college or another appropriate service if your reactions are continuing, getting worse or affecting your everyday life.
Seek urgent help if you are not safe. If you are thinking about suicide or self-harm, feel unable to keep yourself safe, are at immediate risk from another person or have a serious physical injury, seek urgent support. You can contact NHS 111 for urgent mental health support, call 999 or go to A&E in an emergency.
How to help a loved one
Help them feel safe. After a traumatic event, someone may feel unsafe even when the immediate danger has passed. Where possible, help them get somewhere they feel secure and supported. If there is an ongoing risk to their safety, help them access appropriate professional or emergency support rather than trying to manage the situation yourself.
Let them know you are there. You do not need to know exactly what to say or have a solution to what has happened. Simply letting someone know that you are available can be reassuring. You could say that you are there if they want to talk, spend time together or need practical help.
Listen without putting pressure on them. If they want to talk about what happened, listen and allow them to decide how much they want to share. Avoid repeatedly asking for details or encouraging them to describe the event when they are not ready. They may need time before they feel able to talk.
Do not judge their reaction. People can respond to trauma in very different ways. They might be frightened, angry, tearful, withdrawn, numb, confused or unusually calm. Their response may also change from day to day. Try not to assume that someone who appears calm is unaffected or that someone who is very upset is coping badly.
Avoid telling them how they should feel. Comments such as “you need to move on”, “try not to think about it” or “at least you are okay now” may be intended to help but can make someone feel that their reaction is being dismissed. Instead, acknowledge that what happened was difficult and give them space to respond in their own way.
Offer practical support. Trauma can make everyday tasks feel overwhelming. Ask whether you can help with things such as preparing meals, shopping, transport, school or work, appointments, household responsibilities or contacting services. Practical support can reduce pressure while they focus on recovering.
Help them maintain some routine. Familiar activities and routines can provide a sense of stability after something frightening has happened. Encourage them to eat regularly, rest, attend school or work where appropriate and stay connected with supportive people. Avoid putting pressure on them to immediately return to their usual level of functioning.
Respect their boundaries. Someone may need more space or privacy than usual after a traumatic event. Ask what they are comfortable with and respect their wishes around talking, physical contact, visitors and social activities. Let them know that you are still available even if they do not want support at that particular moment.
Encourage, but do not force, them to talk. Talking can be helpful, but people process trauma differently. You can create opportunities for them to talk without making them feel that they have to. Sometimes sitting together, going for a walk or doing an ordinary activity can provide support without requiring a conversation about what happened.
Help them access professional support. If they are struggling with their emotions, sleep, concentration, relationships or everyday activities, encourage them to speak to a GP or another appropriate professional. You could offer to help them make an appointment, write down what they want to discuss or go with them if they would find this helpful.
Take changes in behaviour seriously. You may notice that they are avoiding people or places, having nightmares, becoming easily startled, withdrawing from activities, using alcohol or drugs, becoming unusually angry or struggling to concentrate. These can be signs that they are having difficulty coping with what happened. Respond with concern rather than criticism and encourage them to seek support if these difficulties continue.
Help them limit distressing reminders where appropriate. If they are repeatedly watching upsetting videos, reading distressing news or checking social media for information about the event, gently encourage breaks. Avoiding all reminders indefinitely may not be helpful, but reducing unnecessary exposure to distressing material can give them space to recover.
Reassure them without dismissing their concerns. It can be helpful to remind someone that they are not alone and that strong reactions can happen after frightening experiences. However, avoid making promises that everything will definitely be fine or telling them that they should not be worried. Listen to what they are concerned about and help them identify what support they need.
Do not blame them for what happened. Someone who has experienced trauma may blame themselves or repeatedly think about what they could have done differently. Avoid reinforcing this self-blame. Remind them gently that being involved in a traumatic situation does not mean they were responsible for what happened.
Be patient. Recovery does not always happen quickly or in a straight line. Someone may seem better for a while and then have a difficult day or experience a new reaction to a reminder. Try to focus on what they need now rather than expecting them to recover according to a particular timeline.
Keep checking in. Someone may initially receive lots of support immediately after an event and then feel alone once other people begin returning to their normal lives. A simple message, phone call or invitation to spend time together can show that you have not forgotten about them.
Support them to reconnect with things they enjoy. When someone is struggling, they may stop doing activities they previously enjoyed. Gentle invitations to watch a favourite programme, listen to music, go outside, see friends or take part in a hobby can provide moments of normality. Do not pressure them if they are not ready.
Look after yourself too. Supporting someone after a traumatic event can be emotionally difficult, particularly if you were also affected by what happened. You cannot be someone’s only source of support or be responsible for making them recover. Make time for your own needs, use your support network and seek professional help if you are struggling.
Know when to seek urgent help. If the person talks about suicide or self-harm, says they cannot keep themselves safe, is at immediate risk from another person, has seriously injured themselves or is experiencing another emergency, take this seriously. Call 999 or go to A&E in an emergency. For urgent mental health support that is not an immediate emerg
Myth buster
Myth: If you look okay after a traumatic event, you must be okay
Truth: People respond to trauma in different ways, and someone may appear calm or carry on with everyday activities while still feeling distressed internally. Some reactions may also develop later rather than immediately.
Myth: Everyone who experiences a traumatic event will develop PTSD
Truth: Not everyone who experiences trauma develops PTSD. Many people experience difficult reactions that gradually reduce with time, safety and support. Developing a strong reaction does not mean that someone will necessarily develop a mental health condition.
Myth: You should be over a traumatic event quickly
Truth: There is no fixed timeline for recovering from trauma. Some people feel better relatively quickly, while others need longer to adjust. Recovery can involve difficult days as well as periods when things feel more manageable.
Myth: Talking about what happened immediately is always helpful
Truth: Talking can be helpful, but people should not be pressured to discuss a traumatic experience before they are ready. Some people need time and space before they feel able to talk about what happened.
Myth: Talking about the trauma will make you feel worse
Truth: Talking about a traumatic experience does not automatically make things worse. When someone feels safe and is supported appropriately, talking can be part of processing what happened. However, people should be able to choose when, how and with whom they talk.
Myth: You should avoid everything that reminds you of the trauma
Truth: Avoiding reminders can feel helpful in the short term, but avoiding more and more situations can sometimes maintain fear and make everyday life more difficult. If avoidance is significantly affecting your life, a trained professional can help you approach reminders safely and gradually.
Myth: A traumatic event only affects the people who were physically hurt
Truth: Someone can be significantly affected by witnessing a traumatic event, believing that someone they care about was in danger or being exposed to something frightening. Psychological effects do not depend on having visible physical injuries.
Myth: If you cannot remember everything that happened, something is wrong with you
Truth: Memories of traumatic events can sometimes be unclear, fragmented or difficult to recall, particularly when someone was extremely frightened or overwhelmed. Memory can be affected by intense stress, and this does not mean that your reaction is abnormal.
Myth: Feeling numb means you do not care about what happened
Truth: Emotional numbness or feeling detached can be a response to overwhelming experiences. Someone may temporarily feel disconnected from their emotions or from what has happened, even when the event is deeply important to them.
Myth: You need to stay strong for everyone else
Truth: You do not have to hide your emotions or manage everything on your own after a traumatic event. It is okay to need support, take time to recover and tell people when you are struggling.
Myth: Having a good day means you have recovered
Truth: Recovery is not always a straight line. You can have moments when you feel happy, relaxed or like yourself and still experience difficult symptoms later. Feeling better for a while does not invalidate the difficulties you may still be experiencing.
Myth: Enjoying yourself after a traumatic event means you did not care
Truth: It is possible to experience difficult emotions and still laugh, enjoy yourself or take part in normal activities. Having positive moments does not mean that you have forgotten what happened or that the event was not important to you.
Myth: Trauma is only about what happened during the event
Truth: The impact of trauma can continue after the event has ended. Memories, reminders, changes in relationships, worries about safety and changes in everyday life can all affect how someone feels afterwards.
Myth: You have to have PTSD to get help
Truth: You can seek support whenever you are struggling after a traumatic event. You do not need to have a diagnosis or wait until your symptoms become severe before talking to a healthcare professional or someone you trust.
Myth: Asking for help means you are not coping
Truth: Seeking support can be an important part of coping with trauma. You may need practical, emotional or professional support while you recover, and asking for help does not mean that you are weak or incapable.
Support
You do not have to deal with the effects of a traumatic event on your own. Support can come from people you already know, healthcare professionals, education or workplace services, and specialist organisations. The type of support you need may change over time depending on how you are feeling and what is happening in your life.
Trusted people can provide emotional and practical support. This could include a parent, carer, family member, friend, partner, teacher or another adult you trust. You do not have to tell them everything that happened. You can simply let them know that you are struggling and tell them what would be helpful, such as having someone listen, spending time together or getting help with everyday tasks.
Your GP can be a useful first point of contact if you are experiencing ongoing difficulties after a traumatic event. They can talk to you about your symptoms, consider whether you need further assessment and discuss appropriate treatment or referrals. You can speak to your GP even if you are unsure whether what you are experiencing is related to the trauma or whether your difficulties are “serious enough”.
If you are a child or young person, you may also be able to access support through your school or college. A teacher, pastoral team, school counsellor, safeguarding lead, school nurse or another trusted member of staff may be able to listen, help you communicate what has happened and identify additional support. You can ask for help even if you are worried about what will happen after you tell someone.
If you are already receiving support from mental health services, tell your care team about any changes in your symptoms following the traumatic event. They can consider whether your current support needs to change or whether additional psychological or practical support would be helpful.
Children and young people may be able to access specialist support through Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS), depending on their age, needs and local services. CAMHS can provide assessment and psychological support for young people experiencing significant emotional or mental health difficulties.
Some people may benefit from specialist trauma services, particularly when they are experiencing persistent trauma-related symptoms such as intrusive memories, nightmares, avoidance, hypervigilance or significant changes in mood and functioning. Access to specialist services varies depending on your circumstances and local area, and a GP or other healthcare professional can help you understand what is available.
If the traumatic event involved abuse, violence, exploitation or another safeguarding concern, it is important to seek appropriate support to help keep you safe. You do not have to confront the person responsible or manage the situation yourself. A trusted adult, healthcare professional, safeguarding team or relevant specialist service can help you consider your options.
You may also need practical support following a traumatic event. Depending on what has happened, this could include help with housing, finances, education, work, transport, medical appointments or communicating with other services. Trauma can affect your ability to manage everyday responsibilities, so asking for practical help is okay.
Reasonable adjustments may also be helpful if trauma-related difficulties are affecting education or work. You may benefit from temporary changes to workload, deadlines, attendance, breaks, communication or the environment. Speak to your school, college, university or employer about what support may be available.
If you are supporting someone who has experienced trauma, remember that you can also seek advice and support for yourself. You may have your own emotional reaction to what happened, particularly if you witnessed the event or were closely involved. Supporting someone does not mean that you have to manage everything alone.
You should seek urgent support if you are experiencing thoughts of suicide or self-harm, feel unable to keep yourself safe, are at immediate risk from another person or have a serious physical injury. For urgent mental health support that is not an immediate emergency, contact NHS 111 and select the mental health option. In an emergency or if there is an immediate risk to life, call 999 or go to A&E.
You do not have to wait until your difficulties become severe before asking for help. Getting support early can help you understand your reactions, identify what you need and prevent difficulties from becoming more overwhelming.
Therapy interventions
Therapy can help you understand and manage the emotional and psychological impact of a traumatic event. Different approaches can support you in processing what happened, reducing distress, managing trauma-related symptoms and rebuilding a sense of safety. The type of support offered will depend on your individual needs, experiences and preferences.
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) – CBT helps you understand the links between your thoughts, feelings, physical sensations and behaviours, and can help you develop healthier ways of responding to trauma-related thoughts and feelings.
- Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (TF-CBT) – TF-CBT is a form of CBT specifically adapted for people experiencing difficulties following a traumatic event. It can help you process aspects of the trauma, manage distress and reduce avoidance.
- Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) – EMDR helps you process distressing traumatic memories so they become less emotionally overwhelming and feel more like memories of something that happened rather than something happening now.
- Prolonged Exposure (PE) – PE helps you gradually and safely approach traumatic memories and situations you have been avoiding, with the aim of reducing fear and helping you feel more able to manage reminders of the trauma.
- Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT) – CPT helps you identify and challenge unhelpful thoughts and beliefs that may have developed following trauma, such as blaming yourself for what happened or believing that you are no longer safe.
- Supportive counselling – Supportive counselling provides a safe space to talk about your experiences, emotions and difficulties following a traumatic event, while developing ways to cope and move forward.
- Family therapy – Family therapy helps families communicate about the impact of a traumatic event, understand each other’s reactions and identify ways of supporting one another.
- Psychoeducation – Psychoeducation helps you understand common trauma responses and why you may experience symptoms such as anxiety, nightmares, intrusive memories, avoidance or feeling constantly alert.
- Occupational Therapy (OT) – OT can help you manage practical difficulties following trauma, including changes to routines, sleep, education, work and everyday activities.
Helplines
Victim Support
Victim Support is an independent charity providing free, confidential support for people affected by crime and traumatic incidents. They support people affected by issues including bullying, abuse, sexual violence, domestic abuse, hate crime and other crimes.
Phone: 0808 1689 111
Opening times: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week
Live chat: Available 24 hours a day
Website: www.victimsupport.org.uk
Samaritans
Samaritans is a charity providing emotional support to anyone who is struggling to cope or needs someone to talk to. They are there for people experiencing all sorts of difficulties, including stress, anxiety, loneliness, relationship or family problems, bereavement, feeling overwhelmed and concerns about mental health or suicide.
Phone: 116 123
Opening times: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
Website: www.samaritans.org
Childline
Childline is a free service for young people to talk to a counsellor about anything. The service is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Childline is available to anybody who is 18 years old or younger.
Phone: 0800 1111
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
You can also find helpful resources, speak to a counsellor online or send a message on their site.
Website: www.childline.org.uk
For adults concerned about a child, the NSPCC can be contacted
NSPCC
NSPCC is a children’s charity that works to protect children and prevent abuse and neglect. They provide support and advice for adults about child abuse, neglect, child safety, online safety and children’s mental and emotional wellbeing.
Phone: 0808 800 5000
Opening times: 10 am–4 pm, Monday–Friday
Email: help@nspcc.org.uk
Email opening times: 11 am–4 pm, 7 days a week
Website: www.nspcc.org.uk
YoungMinds
YoungMinds is a national charity supporting the mental health and wellbeing of children and young people. They provide information, advice and support for parents and carers who are concerned about a young person’s mental health, and help people understand mental health difficulties, find appropriate support and access useful resources. Their Parents Helpline can provide information, advice, emotional support and signposting to other services.
Parent helpline: 0808 802 5544 (9:30 am – 4 pm on Mondays, Thursdays and Fridays, and from 9:30 am – 6 pm on Tuesdays and Wednesdays)
Email: parents@youngminds.org.uk
Webchat: https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/parents-helpline/
Shout
Shout is a free, confidential text messaging service that provides support to anyone who is struggling to cope. It can help with a wide range of issues, including stress, anxiety, low mood, loneliness, relationship difficulties, bullying, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, feeling overwhelmed and other mental health challenges.
Text: SHOUT to 85258
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year
Website: www.giveusashout.org
NHS 111 (Option 2)
NHS 111 is an NHS service providing urgent medical and mental health advice and support. It can help with mental health concerns, emotional distress, anxiety, low mood, suicidal thoughts and other urgent health problems.
Phone: For mental health support, call 111 and select the mental health option (option 2).
Opening times: Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Mind
Mind is a mental health charity providing information, advice and support for people experiencing mental health difficulties. They cover a wide range of mental health and wellbeing issues, including anxiety, depression, stress, relationships, loneliness, coping with difficult experiences and managing everyday life. Mind provides information to help people understand what they are experiencing, know their rights, find appropriate support and feel less alone.
Phone: 0300 123 3393
Opening times: 9am–6pm, Monday to Friday (excluding bank holidays)
Email: info@mind.org.uk
Website: www.mind.org.uk
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably)
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) is a charity providing support for people who are struggling with their mental health or experiencing emotional distress. They support people with issues including low mood, anxiety, loneliness, stress, suicidal thoughts and difficult life experiences.
Phone: 0800 58 58 58
Opening times: 5pm–midnight, every day
Webchat: 5pm–midnight, every day
WhatsApp: Available through the CALM website
Website: http://www.thecalmzone.net
Rape Crisis England & Wales
Rape Crisis England & Wales is a charity providing free, specialist support for people affected by rape, sexual assault, sexual abuse, sexual harassment and other forms of sexual violence. They provide emotional support, counselling, advocacy and information for victims and survivors.
Phone: 0808 500 2222
Opening times: 24 hours a day, 365 days a year
Online chat: Available 24 hours a day
Website: www.rapecrisis.org.uk
Age: 16+ for the national Support Line
24/7 Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Line
The 24/7 Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Line is a free, confidential service providing emotional support for people aged 16 and over affected by rape, sexual abuse, sexual assault, sexual harassment or other forms of sexual violence.
Phone: 0808 500 2222
Opening times: 24 hours a day, 365 days a year
Online chat: Available 24 hours a day
Website: www.247sexualabusesupport.org.uk
